So, wow.  I’ve been here for a year.  It’s a long time and made longer by the fact that I am not yet closer to the other side – a year away from home, but not yet a year as a full-fledged Peace Corps Volunteer.  In any case, it’s been a good year.  Not easy, but generally life isn’t and it isn’t that much fun if it is easy at all times.  I’ve learned a lot and grown (stuff besides fungus and vegetables, too!) and those can be painful processes.  But as Master Jeon has been known to say, there is good pain, bad pain, and crazy pain. 

In this first year here, there’s been some of each of the first two and fortunately none of the last!  But without a doubt pain has not been the primary feeling out here.  This is great.  It is not perfect, but it is great.  I live in a world that I help to enrich, palpably, just about every single day.  And it is a world so different and beautiful and vibrant that it defies description.   Not always comfortably so, but I didn’t come out here looking for comfort.  Those are very good things to be part of – things that are deeply enriching for me as well.

So, a year in, I’m glad to be here.  But man do I miss the people and activities that make America home.  Thanksgiving, Passover, Ariel’s black belt test and the TKD Semi at Cornell right now (Yay!  Go Ariel!), her 21^st birthday, two weddings, two babies (well that’s looking ahead…) and who knows how much other stuff.  It’s a daunting list and those are things I’ll never get back.  But you can’t go through life focusing on the opportunity cost of doing something big and dynamic and different.  So I’m sad to miss those things.  It’s really tough to not be a part of some many things and lives that I love.  But this right now is too important part of my life to regret it – I’m having a great time and knowing what I gave up to have it just helps me get that much more out of the experience.

But giving up stuff is never easy and so thank you to everyone that has helped me.  Everytime somebody thinks of me – with an email or a text or a message or a letter or a package or a visit! or even just a mention somewhere – it makes me feel good and like I’m still a part of everything that is important to me back home.  I’m not out here to leave anything behind.  So much of it I’m desperately trying not to!  I am out here trying to add something meaningful and new to what I have.  And, I have to say, it’s working – through no small part thanks to you!  Just reading and thinking about me helps, too J

Positive life changing events aren’t always easy to find and I’ve been pretty lucky to date.  So I do not feel sorry for myself that I am having to work hard for this one.  Hard is hard, of course, but I guess all of the above boils down to the fact that, at this moment, it feels worth it.

But some days are tougher than others, that’s for sure!  And when they are, I dive into some of the things that remind me of home and the people and things I know and love and it helps.  Economists from Andy, chocolate from various Saffers and Delahanty’s (or sisters formerly known as Delahanty!), home decorations from said sisters – stuff like that.   So thank you again, for that stuff and the many other messages and post cards and all of it.  It is great and I appreciate it!

Of course, there is one other thing I miss tremendously that is almost impossible to answer while living as a Peace Corps Volunteer.  Food!  Oh man I miss some of the food!  You all know that and it doesn’t help that I am a somewhat…lazy and sub-par cook.   I could do more to rectify my pain on that front than I do, admittedly.  Ooh!  Thanksgiving loaf!  Thanks, Cara!

But anyway, this week I cooked a meal that kinda captures all the stuff I’m talking about in this post.  Building on the past and the love, support, and wisdom of my friends and family and the things I am gaining here to make something in and of my life that is better than either by itself.  And so, you will find, in the next post, a description of that!  In a slightly different, tone J